Warp-speed

Have you ever felt like the world is moving around you in warp-speed? As if you are trying to catch up with a high-speed train while you are running in slow motion...

Lately, more specifically the last months, have been a catch-up game with time for me.
Uni-life is very stressful and I am living in an endless cycle of studying-eating-studying-sleeping. It is exhausting and I cannot wait for exams to be over (only a few more weeks!).

But it is also exciting. Every day I learn new, interesting things. Every day I am pushed to my limits to achieve more than the day before. Every day is an exciting challenge waiting to me mastered.
So now that my first proper year of uni is coming to a close, I am already looking forward to the next.

It is wondrous to think that I am already a third through my Bachelor degree. How did the time pass so fast? How can I, who feels as if I am moving through the days, weeks, and months in slow motion simultaneously be moving through my degree in warp-speed?

Time is intangible, yet it is treated as something we can influence and mold. We categorise and measure it in an attempt to create a sense of power and security. But inevitably, we cannot categorise our sense of time. Inevitably we have no power, no certainty over time.

So even though I have no power over how fast time passes, I have to accept that it is moving in seemingly warp-speed. There is no use in reminiscing about how the year has gone too fast. It will not make time pass any slower. Instead, I have decided to continue moving forward, facing each day with as much energy as I can muster.

This summer I will try and live as much as possible. Be more active, discover new places, and take the time to relax - and read a lot. Time may pass too fast and it may seem as if looking forward to a benign thing such as reading is a waste. But I think taking the time to do the things we love, however unproductive they may be, is as crucial as putting in a hundred per cent at uni or work.

My point is that no matter how little time you think you may have, it is important to value the little things such as taking a long bath. It is important to take the time to relax and wind-down. I know I have failed to acknowledge this importance of relaxing this past year, which is why I felt it was important to write it down. So it can serve as a reminder to me and you to never underestimate a little bit of relaxation time.

So go ahead, take a hot bath, drink a glass of wine, listen to your favorite album!

If you don't know what to listen to, I recently found this amazing band:

Have a listen, relax, and enjoy living life.

Promise to write more often,
xoxo
Em

Another love, another life, another me

As we go through life, things we thought would last forever, do not. Instead they make room for new, maybe even better things.

Life is exciting and it is a somewhat basic need to share this excitement with others, who support us. I grew up believing that you should never hesitate to take opportunities to develop and grow as a person. Follow your dreams and you have endless possibilities.

And as hard as it may be, when you have to choose between your own dreams, wishes, and plans and those of another, the choice should always be based on your own happiness and goals. It is not easy and ultimately, people, yourself included, can, and often will, get hurt. But in the end all you will regret, is not taking the chance to go out of your comfort zone, to explore new countries and cultures, and to live your life fully.

You might have guessed by now that I am talking about love.
Love comes and goes, changes and rearranges itself, and in the end is not what we expected at all.
As people change and grow, they don't necessarily do so in the same direction, thus grow apart, which can open up new windows and doors for them to take.

So, basically, what I am trying to say is that life is too short not to be lived. Dare to live.

This is one of my current favorites. It is incredibly sad but heartfelt and, for me, true. So have a listen!

Talk soon,
xoxo
Em

Uncertainty

(Just a short heads-up - my last post was about a similar topic, but I feel like I cannot stress living in a forward motion enough, so I had to write another post about it)

You are looking at that raspberry brownie and you know you want it, you need it. But then your vision slides off just a tiny bit to the right and there it is - a death-by-chocolate cake! Now you definitely want the cake. Oh but the blueberry muffin looks delicious too. But actually you still want the brownie... can I have a bit of everything please?

Do you know that scene? If you're not as big a sweet tooth as I am, then imagine yourself trying to figure out which chips you want - salt and vinegar, barbecue or maybe the sour cream & onion - or whatever else makes your will to decide vanish. You get the point, I hope.

Sometimes you think you know exactly what you want until, suddenly and without warning, other temptations come along and you're not so sure anymore about whether your prior choice is the right one and if it will make you happy. I absolutely detest being in this sort of situation but never seem to be able to escape them.

Just recently I had the debacle of having to decide if I wanted a caramel or raspberry brownie. Thankfully my friend, who I was having coffee with, offered to share so I got to have both. But how often do you have the choice of both? Exactly.
How do you decide what you want in the end, and do you sometimes regret your choices afterwards?
So many questions and no right answer...

By now I probably have confused you and I am sorry about that. Today is just one of those days where I cannot stop pondering about what my future might hold for me and if I have made the right decisions so far and what might change if I go either down road A or B. You see living in a new country, going to a new Uni and meeting new people has made me think about life differently. Do I regret coming here? No! Would I do it again? I don't know. Things might have been so different to what they are now, but does that make the present any less wonderful?

I think what I am trying to say is that life is full of uncertainty and nothing we do will ever erase this feeling of doubt we have about some things. The only reasonable thing we can do to cope with this uncertainty in my opinion, is to face it head first and without looking back. There is no use in living in the past or, what is even worse, pretending as if it was all bad or all good. We don't live in a world that is only categorised into black & white. The world is full of colour and we should embrace just that.

So if you are doubting any of your decisions or have some regrets: try put them behind you. Start every day as a fresh and empty canvas. You alone can achieve so much by simply living life with your eyes and mind open to new opportunities. Of course there will be times where you will come to regret a decision made, and not every day will be a good day. Mais c'est la vie, mon ami!
See each day as an opportunity rather than a burden and you will come to find that even bad decisions or mistakes, are of value. Appreciate the good and happy moments you have and never, no matter how bleak a situation is, give up hope for good things to happen. The sun always comes out eventually.

To finish this confusing and rather rambling monologue, I will leave you with a song that makes me happy. It may be about love, but I think it still fits, because inevitably good things will happen to us in our life, no matter our regrets and mistakes, and maybe it hasn't happened just yet.

talk soon,
xoxo
Em

Forgive and Forget

It is one of those days where you cannot stop revisiting old memories.

Contemplating whether you acted childish, unfairly or simply put: stupid. But going back to the past and thinking of what might have been does not help you live in a forward motion. And that is essentially what you have to do.  Unless you want to end up sitting in your home, alone, with a thousand cats as your only friends. Don't get me wrong - cats are cool animals, but they can't replace human beings as friends.

So what I am trying to say is that no matter how many regrets you have, or how often you relive that one moment: you cannot go back and change it to what you would have liked. All you can do is accept that is turned out differently, and live your life in such a way that you create moments you can fondly remember. Of course you cannot prevent things from happening that you will regret. But you can go about life with a positive attitude, taking everything as it comes and not reliving the past over and over, tormenting yourself over and over again.

In the end all that counts are the good memories we have our life. And most importantly try to love yourself some more. No one expects you to be perfect. You can make mistakes without being a bad person...

Thus, forgive yourself and others for messing up (by this I do not mean that you should forgive violence and abuse!) and forget all about trying to change things that happened in the past.






This song has been stuck in my head the entire day and somehow triggered my thoughts for this post. So I thought you might want to have a listen to it as well :)


So much for wanting to write more regularly and not too much about emotional outbursts. Oh well, I hope you can relate to what I was saying - or at least a bit.

See you soon,
xoxo
Em

Love is all you need

When you think about yourself what comes to mind?
Are you happy with who you are? Do you feel comfortable in your own skin?

For a lot of people self-consciousness, discontent and doubt predominate all thoughts concerning themselves. Be it their body or personality, a minority can say they love themselves the way they are and pass a polygraph examination. There always seems to be something "wrong" or "ugly" about yourself. You are too naive, you are too loud, you are too timid, you are fat, you are too skinny (primarily refers to skinny girls who think their frontier is too small), your laugh is awkward, your hair is too curly, your hair is too straight, your teeth are too yellow, your fingers are too chubby, your knees look like a face, your face looks as bumpy and bruised as the moon's surface,...

And sadly enough the media encourage this self-conscious behavior by putting size-zero models and stars on their covers, which in addition have been photoshopped heavily. Although there has been a shift towards so-called "oversize models", which let us be honest are completely normal sized women, walking on the runways as well as the all-skin-and-bones-models the general understanding of what is beautiful is dominated by Photoshop.

Now how are we supposed to learn to love ourselves if we are constantly being bombarded by fake-perfect images and constant "new revelations how exactly we can look just like our favorite actor/actress"? As soon as you believe that you can only be beautiful if you weigh as much (or little), wear the same clothes and use the same beauty products as your idols, you miss out on the opportunity to unfold all your inner beauty. The obsession with adapting other people's physique is very harmful for our own body image. Of course I am not saying that it is bad if you live healthy and take up on a few tips and habits of your favorite model or star - on the contrary! Some fitness routines are worth trying. But you should never fall into the habit of overly restricting yourself or worse punishing yourself just because you want to look like a photoshopped star!

Struggling to accept, appreciate and eventually love yourself has also been part of my life. Not only did I suffer under quite severe Acne throughout my entire high-school career but I am of a naturally more curvy posture, which means that I was never as skinny as my fellow class mates and friends. This led to me pretty much hating my body and as a result myself.

I tried everything to get rid off the Acne - all the expensive creams and treatments the celebrities talk about, all the diet changes that are suggested by experts. Nothing helped. During this period of time I started eating less and less and still was not satisfied with the way I looked. I did loose weight and today I can say that I was not even chubby to start with, but with a mind focused on looking like a photoshopped celebrity I was still as unhappy as before. So I started stress eating. And by this I mean a packet of cookies or a bar of chocolate close to every second day. I was unhappy, unhealthy and exhausted. At this point I was desperate to be noticed by the older boys at school although I was sure no one would even want to look at me because of my ugly face.

But miraculously my mindset changed. I focused on the attributes that I liked about myself and tried to emphasise those rather than focalise on all the things I did not think were pretty. I noticed that my figure actually was attractive and that being an hour-glass shape is something to be proud not ashamed of. My smile suddenly seemed softer, my eyes more tantalising and my acne was still there but it did not bother me that much anymore. I had started to like myself.

Over time I have learned to love myself the way I am with all my imperfections and flaws. It does not matter that I don't have the body of a model or the wits of a scientist. I eat healthy but every now and then indulge myself in some cake without worrying about "all these calories". I have found a balance between being disciplined with sports and healthy eating and enjoying life with all its perks (You know exactly what I'm talking about: nice long lazy days in bed with chocolate, chips and movies.). I see no point in overthinking all the things that might not be perfect about myself. Of course I still have insecurities and at times need to be reminded why I should love myself - thankfully there is something called friends and family! ;)

A group of people who love and support you are just as important to loving yourself as oxygen is for breathing. Everyone deserves to be loved by themselves and others and I think accepting your imperfections is the first step towards this feeling of appreciation.

I am not sure if this helped at all if you are self-conscious. But I hope the fact that I have overcome my insecurities is at least inspiration enough to look at yourself a little bit different! Because ultimately everyone is beautiful, they just have to discover in which way.

To conclude I thought this song would be a good happy-maker. Because whether you know it or not there is someone who loves you and sees all the beauty you carry within.


Talk soon,
xoxo
Em

Blueberries, Cherries or Applesauce...?

It has been a while. I'm sorry!

These last few weeks have been very busy as well as being unproductive simultaneously (if that makes sense).

I am currently trying to push myself and work very hard on getting on with my studies. My course with the european Uni will still continue until May, but I am trying not to have to work double between March (when my Uni in New Zealand starts) and May. Thus the only choice left is for me to finish all my work before Uni starts. Yey. I am managing rather well considering that it is a lovely summer with warm weather, inviting you to spend the entire day outside at the beach, swimming or just relaxing in that little strapless bikini that is just perfect for tanning. Yet the temptation has not overwhelmed my strong will to finish the workload of four weeks within one. That is pretty good is it not?

To be completely honest though, I of course am a master in procrastination, which has lead to quite a lot of series watching (I am nearly done with the second season of Prisonbreak! And even though it is giving me nightmares it is so good that it is simply impossible to stop.) and baking. My main aim was to find some really delicious recipes for breakfast muffins. Don't we all have those days where the snooze button has been pushed too often and there is barely any time to get dressed to be on time for work, uni or an important meeting. This inevitably leads to skipping breakfast, which is a no-no as breakfast is one of the most important meals of the day. It boosts your metabolism and gives you the energy to have a really good start into your day.
Now I am a very big fan of planning and preparing for busy days where I know that I will just not have the time to prepare something nice to eat. And since I just love muffins I thought I might as well look for some healthy and delicious recipes so that I can make batch beforehand and get me those extra minutes of time on busy days.

Of course everyone has their own preferences but I thought I might share my two favorite breakfast muffin recipes with you :)

1. Blueberry-Maple Muffins

INGREDIENTS

            1/3 cup whole quick oats

            1 cup whole-wheat flour

            3/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour 

(I just use normal flour instead of two different kinds)

            1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder

            1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

            1/2 teaspoon baking soda

            1/4 teaspoon salt

            2 large eggs

            1/2 cup pure maple syrup

            1 cup nonfat buttermilk 

(if you don't have buttermilk just add 1tbsp of vinegar to 1 cup of milk to get a sort of "sour milk")

            2 teaspoons freshly grated lemon zest

            1 tablespoon lemon juice

            1 teaspoon vanilla extract

            1 1/2 cups fresh blueberries

            1 tablespoon sugar

           

           

DIRECTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 200°C. Coat 12 muffin cups with cooking spray or simply put muffin cups into the tray.

2. Put quick oats in a large bowl. Add flour, baking powder, cinnamon, baking soda and salt; whisk to blend. Whisk eggs and maple syrup in a medium bowl until smooth. Add buttermilk (or "sour milk"), lemon zest, lemon juice and vanilla; whisk until blended.

3. Make a well in the dry ingredients and stir in the wet ingredients with a rubber spatula just until moistened. Fold in blueberries. Scoop the batter into the prepared muffin cups. Sprinkle the tops with sugar.

4. Bake the muffins until the tops are golden brown and spring back when touched lightly, 15 to 25 minutes. Let cool in the pan for 5 minutes. Loosen edges and turn muffins out onto a wire rack to cool slightly.

2.  Applesauce Cinnamon Oat Muffins

INGREDIENTS

1 1/2    cup    quick oats

1 1/4    cup    wheat flour, white, all-purpose

1/2    cup    brown sugar

1    teaspoon    baking powder

3/4    teaspoon    baking soda

3/4    teaspoon    ground cinnamon

1/2    teaspoon    salt

1    cup    applesauce ( unsweetened )

1/2    cup    skim milk

3    tablespoons    canola oil

1/2    teaspoon    vanilla extract

1    egg whites

DIRECTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 200°C. Grease a muffin tin or line with liners and set aside. 

2. 
In a large bowl combine the first seven ingredients (dry ingredients).

3. 
In another bowl combine the wet ingredients together. 

4. Stir wet ingredients into dry ingredients and mix slowly until just combined.
 Fill muffins tins or liners 3/4 full with batter.


5. Bake for 15-18 minutes (or until toothpick comes out clean).

As you can see I ate my muffin with some vanilla ice-cream for dessert but it works just as well as a delicious breakfast on the go! 

(the two recipes from above are not mine - I found them whilst looking for ideas - but I forgot to jot down where exactly I got them from)

There is one last recipe I would like to share with you. It is from my mother's Weight Watchers magazine and I absolutely love it! It is really easy and quickly prepared and tastes delicious. 

They call it a Makeover Blueberry Pie but I like to use all sorts of fruits for it. Cherries, plums, strawberries, blueberries or a mixture of two different fruits all work really well! 

INGREDIENTS

375-400g fresh blueberries (or other fruit)

1 tbs cornflour

1 tbs caster sugar

1 tsp finely grated lemon rind

1-2 sheets frozen reduced-fat shortcrust pastry, just thawed

2 tsp raw sugar

DIRECTIONS

1. Toss the fruit, cornflour, caster sugar and lemon rind in a bowl to combine.

2. Line the base and side of a tart tin/form with 1 sheet of pastry. Trim the edge of the pastry and spread the fruit mixture over the pastry.

3. Cut the other sheet of pastry into around 2,5cm wide strips. Arrange the strips in a lattice pattern across the top of the pie (you might have to cut some strips to fit). Press the edges together to seal and trim any excess pastry.

4. Place in the fridge for half an hour. Preheat the oven to 200°C.

5. Place the tin on a baking tray. Brush the pastry with water and sprinkle with the raw sugar. Bake for 35/40 minutes of until golden.

6. Set aside for a bit to cool off a bit before serving. You can add some vanilla ice-cream of simply enjoy it as it is.



Despite my efforts to stay inside and study, summer managed to find and draw me out of the house, which I saw as an opportunity to wear some bold lipstick. Being in a city where nobody knows you helps letting go of all the images you have about yourself and how people ought to see you. It is a chance to show some completely new sides of oneself and try new and bold make-up, clothes, shoes or hair. It felt pretty good to wear the bold lipstick as it made me really feel the mood of summer and embrace the lipstick-lover I secretly am!

 What do you think of the color? Like it? Hate it? Share your opinion in a comment!

'Till next time
xoxo
Em